Where'd You Go
by TheHalf-BloodWriter
Summary: Where'd you go? I miss you so. Seems like it's been forever that you've been gone. BxE & Nessie 10 years post-Breaking Dawn.   When Charlie and Renee die and Bella walks out to mourn indefinitely how will Edward keep himself and his family together?
1. Chapter 1

**Prologue**

Where'd You Go – Fort Minor

Where'd you go?  
I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone.

She said "Some days I feel like shit,  
Some days I wanna quit, and just be normal for a bit,"  
I don't understand why you have to always be gone,  
I get along but the trips always feel so long,  
And, I find myself trying to stay by the phone,  
'Cause your voice always helps me to not feel so alone,  
But I feel like an idiot, workin' my day around the call,  
But when I pick up I don't have much to say,  
So, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,  
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',  
Tellin' you that I've had it with you and your career,  
Me and the rest of the family here singing

"Where'd you go?  
I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone.  
Where'd you go?  
I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone,  
Please come back home..."

You know the place where you used to live,  
Used to barbecue up burgers and ribs,  
Used to have a little party every Halloween with candy by the pile,  
But now, you only stop by every once and a while,  
Shit, I find myself just fillin' my time,  
With anything to keep the thought of you from my mind,  
I'm doin' fine, I plan to keep it that way,  
You can call me if you find that you have something to say,  
And I'll tell you, I want you to know it's a little fucked up,  
That I'm stuck here waitin', at times debatin',  
Tellin' you that I've had it with you and your career,  
Me and the rest of the family here singing

"Where'd you go?  
I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone.  
Where'd you go?  
I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone,  
Please come back home...

I want you to know it's a little fucked up,  
That I'm stuck here waitin', no longer debatin',  
Tired of sittin' and hatin' and makin' these excuses,  
For why you're not around, and feeling so useless,  
It seems one thing has been true all along,  
You don't really know what you've got 'til it's gone,  
I guess I've had it with you and your career,  
When you come back I won't be here and you can sing it...

Where'd you go?  
I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone.  
Where'd you go?  
I miss you so,  
Seems like it's been forever,  
That you've been gone,  
Please come back home...  
Please come back home...  
Please come back home...  
Please come back home...  
Please come back home... 

Full Description -

Bella and Edward have been living together happily as vampires for years now. Renesmee is almost full grown and their life is perfect. But when Charlie and Renee die in a car crash when Charlie is picking up Renee at the airport when she comes to visit, Bella is thrown into a deep depression and goes off on her own. Edward is left behind trying to keep it all together and hopes he will see his beloved again.

Prologue:

APOV

My vision blacked out and I saw two people, Charlie and Renee, being thrown to the dashboard of the car, their seat belts crushing a couple ribs as they went. A car swerved then broadsided into it, its New York license plate showing NAT~672. I saw the radio before Renee slammed into it. 3:41pm, Sunday May 19th 2011. Today. In about 10 seconds. There was no time for prevention. Glass and metal rained down on them and I wished I could close my eyes and not watch as they were both killed.

I opened my eyes and gasped. I would've cried if I could've but my change had taken that away from me. I knew Edward knew now so I mentally told him to tell Bella. I couldn't.

"What, what did you see? Not the Volturi again? Please not them again." She said, whispering to a human ear, but quite loud enough for me to hear. She turned to Edward and wrapped her hand in his, and brought her arm around Nessy who was sitting next to her on the couch in the living room.

"Bella, you're parents at this moment are in a car crash. They don't survive. There was no way to prevent it, it was hardly a vision of the future, she saw their deaths 10 seconds before it happened. It's too late. I'm so sorry, love. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." Edward murmured to her, rubbing the back of her hand with his thumb.

"What? You're lying." She said, looking for a hint of a joke in our eyes. She saw none.

Bella passed out as did Nessy. Nessy was ½ human so of course it was possible. But, passing out shouldn't be possible for vampires, but considering how many rules had been bent for Bella, I knew it was possible. I didn't need to look into the future to know it would be a rough road ahead. Even when you have forever to fix something, that doesn't make it easy.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Alright, so this is my 4th story I'm working on (Love at First Sight which you should all read, and then two which aren't posted) so I can't promise constant attention but I will try for weekly or bi weekly updates. As far as who's POVs it will be, it will be a lot of Edward but there were definitely be other POVs too. I'm planning on some from each member of the Cullen family, plus some BPOV sprinkled in there. This is a sad story. Don't read this si your looking for some light-hearted fun, but that doesn't mean there won't be happy moments. Just because you're missing something doesn't mean you can't find some kind of joy in the world without it. Bella had Jake to calm her, and Edward has Nessy, a reminder in the flesh. I'm not sure where this story is going yet, I'll just let it write itself from here on in and hope it goes well. Remember to R&R, and check out my other story!**

**Xx**

**EPOV**

I saw her fall and got her cradled in my arms before her fall had even really started. I deposited Bella on the couch and caught Nessy then. I looked to someone for help and Carlisle, always ready, took Nessy from me and lay her down on the recliner in the corner.

I went to my Bella. She wasn't breathing, of course, being a vampire she didn't need to but the thought still worried the last vestiges of humanity within me. I shook common sense into those small parts of my brain and realized there was no way to know exactly what was going on with Bella until she regained consciousness.

The thought sat like a boulder inside of me, if a boulder could be heavy. With a human you felt for a pulse and checked if they were breathing. With a vampire there was no way of knowing.

I tried to keep my mind closed to everyone's voices during moments like these, sad. I didn't want to hear their pity, but there was another voice pushing to get into my mind. This one was one I head increasingly often after the Volturi came to see Nessy the first time. Bella's voice. If she was opening her mind to me, she must be conscious, right?

I let myself hear her thoughts and was shocked, was she... dreaming? Impossible. My Bella is a vampire. We don't sleep, we don't pass out and we don't dream. Bella just defied all three of these definitions. She was always different but this was worrying.

Careful to keep the barrier closed to everyone but Bella, I announced my findings to everyone else before focusing on her dream. While I could focus pretty well on two things, or even 10 at once, I still liked giving something my full attention.

"Everyone, Bella, as it seems, has just passed out, and is currently asleep. As we all know, it is medically impossible, considering fainting is caused by a lack of oxygen to the brain. However, emotionally, it is fully possible. The mind shuts down when faced with something that it can't process in the least. That's what's happened to Bella, believe it or not. As much as it will pain me to do so, we just have to wait." I said. I had blocked out their thoughts but their emotions ran clear on their faces.

They all had some kind of strong emotion on their faces. Almost everyone had a look of hurt and true sadness. Alice felt is as the loss of both a sister and an uncle. Seeing Bella hurt, hurt her deeply, and seeing Bella lost like this meant the loss of her favorite sister, and quite possibly her favorite sibling of any of us. Charlie was like an uncle to her. She saw him occasionally, and he always got her little gifts, but was clearly focused on his own little girl She loved him and he loved her though, and they had their own unique bond.

Jasper's face was tightly controlled but I saw beyond it. He had to sit there and feel all our emotions. He probably felt as bad as even Bella, simply because he had to feel her emotions. He was also so caring that, even though Charlie was sometimes a small struggle for him, he felt acutely the loss of someone so dear to his mate, and Bella, who had become his most cherished sister.

Esme's face conveyed pure desolation and empathy. She lost her kid once and she knows the pain of mourning. I could tell she was praying that Bella didn't go down the same path as she had, or that I had almost gone down Renee had also been a good friend of hers and a constant gossip buddy. Though Bella was the newest addition, considering all we had gone through with her, she held a special place in Esme's heart though she loved as all equally..

Carlisle's was very similar to Esme's. Being her mate, he hated her pain, but Charlie was such a good friend of his, and he knew how close Esme was to Renee. He showed his empathy and compassion, but I knew he was already making a plan for how to move forward. He was a doctor, he had to also be thinking about how to wake up Bella, and how it was medically possible.

Emmett's face was grim. His ever-present smile was lost. His bright, loud demeanor was replaced with mourning. He knew Charlie and Renee pretty well. After they got over being scared of him, his attitude became contagious and he was someone they enjoyed being around. His personal loss was evident as well as his feeling of loss for Bella. She had always endeared him and seeing her lost was difficult for him.

Rosalie looked indifferent. Her face was plain, if not a bit angry she didn't have more attention on her. She was looking at Bella with blank eyes. She didn't seem to care at all that Bella just accomplished the impossible and was now limp on the couch, sleeping. She didn't seem to care that Bella did something no vampire should've been able to do. IT made me angry beyond belief. That was the last thing I needed right now. Before I could stop it a feral growl came out of my mouth as I glared at Rosalie.

Carlisle and Esme gasped at me with surprise and I finally let their thoughts in, so I would know how to fix this. I didn't want to mend what was happening with Rosalie, but I needed to know whether Esme and Carlisle knew what she was doing. I let their thoughts flood my head, all except Bella's, who's I was saving for later.

Carlisle must've figured I would listen to his thoughts because he started to talk to me in his mind.

_Edward, I know she isn't in good form now, but she's your sister. Growling at her is unacceptable._ Carlisle's firm voice said in my head.

I listened to Esme's at the same time.

_Oh my gosh Edward! Growling is serious! What could push you to do something like that? _She exclaimed. I didn't want to hear the others, but I figured I should listen anyway.

Alice must've known the same thing as Carlisle because she also talked to me in her head.

_Edward, Rosalie is in the wrong here, but is starting something the best thing you can do right now? Aren't there more important things you could be focusing on, like your daughter or your wife?_ Her voice was calm but assertive. She knew she was right, and unfortunately so did I. I had the joy of having to hear everyone else's thoughts as well.

Jasper was short and to the point in his thoughts, as usual. _I just hope this get's resolved. _

Emmett was his very different from his usual self, while he usually rambled and his thoughts were as loud and dirty as himself, at the moment they were short and somber. _It can't believe either of them..._

Rosalie's I blocked out. Growling again wouldn't make this better.

"I shouldn't have growled. I just can't believe how impassive she is. Bella is her sister and she will have to accept that someday. And no, I am not talking about this anymore. I have to take care of my wife and daughter, who both need me now. Carlisle, will you help me carry them to our house?" I said. I didn't want to talk to Rosalie right now, and I took the opportunity to leave at that second. I saw Alice's look of approval as I scooped Bella's feather-light body in my arm and held her to me. Carlisle scooped Nessy up, even though she was over 100 years younger than me, she looked about my age, and like she was almost too old to be Carlisle's daughter, as did the rest of us.

We ran through the forest behind the house, and I was thankful that we had moved back to Forks. Of course no one knew we were here. They only knew about Nessy. They thought she moved here with her parents – who no one had seen. Of course we moved away from Forks for a couple years after Nessy's birth to Seattle, far enough to make sure we didn't run into anyone, but close enough to see Charlie regularly. We stayed there for 22 years, actually, but we decided 2 years ago that the best thing to do was move back to Forks. We missed our home, which is what Forks had become.

It order to keep our identity secret, we had Nessy buy all the food, and anything else we needed. As vampires we didn't need much, but Nessy was still ½ human. She needed medicine sometimes, and she needed to eat human food for appearances. She also needed to use the bathroom, something different from the rest of us.

I wondered how Jake would take it. Charlie was many things to him .He was another father, as well as his girlfriends grandfather, and his ex girlfriends father, as well as a best friend. This would be difficult for him. He'd probably be over soon. He was never away from Nessy long, and we learned to accept the smell of dog.

We reached our house by the time I had finished thinking of all of this, only about 1.78 seconds.

I rested Bella on her bed and instructed Carlisle to put Nessy next to her. I kissed both my sweet girls on the forehead and lay myself in between them, wishing for the millionth time I could drift off to sleep peacefully. I was left to sit there, thoughts buzzing, waiting for someone to make noise in my too-silent house.

**A/N: Hope you like this. It isn't very long, but a short update. R&R please!**.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:Hi sorry this took so long. I was in a play which took up my time. So ill do what I did before. Shortish frequent updates. So expect another around Monday or so. This is kind of difficult to do so im just doing my best to put out a story. Hope you enjoy.**

**BPOV**

A medley of dim human memories flashed through my eyes. I imagined sitting on Charlie's lap as a little kid when I saw him during the summer. I had a lot of memories of Renee and her ways. She never could hold one aspiration for more than a couple weeks. It was a tiring way to live but it made for an exciting childhood. I saw my life transition to Charlie's house. I relived meeting Edward for the first time, and staring at him in the cafeteria all those days. I relived our first conversations and our first date. I relived prom and the nights he would sleep over. I relived our love prosper and become serious. I relived his marriage proposal and the marriage.

I was also wondering why it was that I wasn't taking in any other information. Why wasn't I seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting and feeling the touch of everything around me? Why wasn't I breathing, it was usually something I did on instinct. What was happening?

I watched scenes from the honeymoon and knew if I was human I would be blushing. I flashed through the pregnancy and for a quick flash my birth. Renesmee's birth. I felt the three days of pure pain until my memories shifted to the clarity I was used to. I relived Renesmee's quick development and our problems with the Volturi.

I wondered why it seemed like I wasn't conscious. I wondered why it felt like that loose band holding my mind was closed and I felt Edward's presence in my mind. His light was bright and immediately next to me, if not holding me, he was so close.

I racked through all feasible options for a vampire who was just sitting with her family to be cut off from all senses, or at least to not be aware of them.

I watched my memories fly faster and faster as I went through more and more possibilities and found none of them fitting.

Just as I realized I was unconscious I relived my most recent memory. My parents are dead.

**EPOV**

Bella's eyes shot open and she looked like she'd be crying if she had the ability to. Her eyes showed infinite sadness even more desolate than the sound of tears. I curled the arm that was under Nessie's neck around Bella's lukewarm waist and pulled her to me, sitting us both up in the process. I picked her up and placed her on my lap and rocked her back and forth, rubbing calming circles on her back. I told her over and over how sorry I was.

"I was unconscious. I was dreaming. I saw my whole life, I saw them in it. I miss them. I miss them. Isn't there anything we can do?" She asked in a voice that cracked with supreme sadness.

"Yes you were. I saw your dreams. You opened your mind. I'm so sorry Bella. I'm so sorry my beloved. I'm so sorry there is nothing Carlisle or any of us can do. They were dead on impact." I said. I felt awful for the last sentence but there was nothing I could do.

She gasped and clutched to my body, breathing shallowly, as would be the usual if she were able to cry. Then again after everything that happened, it wouldn't shock me.

"Bella, beloved, I am so sorry, so so sorry. But we need to focus on Renesmee. She is still unconscious and luckily there is something we can do about her. With you we had no clue if you had died, if that is even possible." I said, realizing that we had a daughter to take care of and other duties whether we could handle it or not.

"I wish." She muttered. I covered her mouth with my hand. I was aghast. I had thought my Bella was dead once and it pushed me immediately to want to join her. Actually losing her in my arms would've been bad enough that I would've torn myself up and burnt the pieces on the spot. Had I not been able to read her mind I would have.

"Bella, I never want you think like that again. I have never been more desperate and desolate in my life than the day I thought you died. My world ended that day. Losing you now when there is something I can do about it would force me to follow." I told her bluntly.

"Let's help Renesmee." She said, avoiding the conversation.

I walked to our bathroom and got a washcloth from the rack next to the sink. I turned on the cold knob and let the warm water wash over my hands and onto the cloth. The water should've felt cold if I were human but my skin was colder than the water that came out of the cool tap.

I wrung it out and walked back into our room and to Nessie's side of the bed. I kissed her forehead before placing the cloth over her forehead and eyes. Bella and I each held onto a hand while she and I twined our fingers together.

I didn't believe in God and I knew I didn't have an immortal soul but at that moment I prayed.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: I just realized it's been way too long since I've posted, and I left off in a bad place, so here you go.**

**EPOV **

I sat praying for I don't know how long. We had decided not to go to school this time around so the need for clocks was surprisingly low. We saw the sun or moon and knew from there. When you never sleep though, life is just one day that never ends. Nessie was the only one with a watch, because she didn't want to be late for school. It was practically impossible, though, considering she could run fast, not as quickly as the rest of us but fast. She could also charm her way out of any punishment. I would be ashamed of her if we all didn't do the same thing.

Nessie flinched and curled her legs. Her breathing became faster for just a moment, and her heart beat went from a flutter to a hummingbird. Just as quickly she relaxed again. Her eyes opened and Bella and I both breathed an unnecessary sigh of relief. Nessie put her fingers to our foreheads, showing us what she had been seeing.

Her images covered my vision and I saw Charlie and Renee driving in Charlie's car along a nondescript highway and crashing. Their heads smashed against the windshield and I heard the cracks as their ribs broke. Her vision was scarily close to Alice's. Being able to see ones thoughts and memories as videos gave one an incredible imagination. And in this case she was able to imagine almost exactly the scene of her grandparent's death. The scene was followed with a sad questioning kind of feeling. She didn't believe it was real, she wanted us to tell her it was just a dream.

Bella made a startled cry that died at her throat. I met Nessie's eyes and gave her the smallest nod. A tear rolled down her cheek, followed by another, and another. In a few seconds they were pouring out and Nessie's small body was shaking. She had gotten Bella's height, and, not being fully grown, was only about 5'2''.

Bella wrapped her arms around Nessie and scootched as close as possible to her on one side, and I put my arms around the both of them. Nessie's shaking shook the three of us and the whole bed. Her sobs were silent. Almost as if her body was incapable of making a sound mournful enough to match her mood.

Jasper tried to send a feeling of acceptance to the house. I felt it, but underneath it I managed to feel his feelings as well, while still keeping everyone's thoughts out. Underneath it all I felt his strain, I felt all our emotions being pushed into him, and the effort it took to push acceptance out to all of us when he felt as desolate as all of us combined.

I let my thoughts open momentarily to him, to find he was thinking one word, desperately to me.

_Please... Please... Please... Please..._

Over and over he pleaded to me, and I clutched my girls even closer, hoping they felt the acceptance Jasper was pushing at them. I hoped they never reached the stage of desperation. I hope they never ended up trying the things I tried when I thought Bella to be dead.

I let myself think on what Bella said, wanting to kill herself. When I thought she was dead my whole world dimmed, and we hadn't even really been together then. I was angry that I still saw the world with such clarity while she would see nothing at all. I wanted to claw my eyes out. I was angry I still heard the laughing of little kids, still happy. I wanted to rip my ears off. I was angry that I missed her scent. I wanted to hack my nose away. I was angry that I could never feel her warm soft skin again. I wanted to slash my hands off. I was horrified my mouth still wanted her blood. I wanted to tear my mouth off. Most of all I was desperately depressed that she was gone, and I had left her. I wished I could slit my throat.

Now that we had a life together and we were married, the pain would be millions of times worse. Every second I loved her more. Even during one of our rare fights, I still loved her more. She was my everything, my savior, and my hope that some kind of God hadn't shunned me during my change, because I had received Bella.

Then when I got Nessie I knew that divine providence was truly with me. I had genetically had a child, a real one. ½ human. And she was fully my own. I loved my daughter like nothing else in the world. The love was a different love from mine and Bella's. It wasn't fiery, it was low and gentle. All I wanted was for my sweet girl to get all she wanted in life. I was the pushover Daddy.

Seeing my two girls in this much pain nearly tore me apart. I was broken. They were broken. We were all broken and I didn't know how to get fixed.


End file.
